


Now What'd You Expect me to Say, When you let me Slip From Your Hands?

by missobsessed22, NKNovak



Series: The City Goer's Guide to the Secrets and Scandals of Republic City [2]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Azula's emotions are valid, Azula's feelings are valid, F/F, Post-Redemption Arc Azula, Redeemed Azula, TW: illicit drug use, Ursa tried her best for Zuko, Ursa was a bad mom to Azula, Ursa was a good mom to Zuko, if that is something you don't like then I suggest you click away, this story will not be kind to Ursa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-08
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-16 08:20:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29329203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missobsessed22/pseuds/missobsessed22, https://archiveofourown.org/users/NKNovak/pseuds/NKNovak
Summary: Azula recently got diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, she goes to therapy and group therapy to work through her problems and not let her illness get the better of her. She’s out of her father’s house and away from his manipulation and influence. She has a good relationship with her brother, her uncle, and great friends. She has people who love and want to help her, a stable support system. Azula is happy, in fact, she is the happiest and the healthiest she’s been in a long time. Then, one day out of the blue, Ursa, her mother, appears in Iroh’s kitchen. . .
Relationships: Azula & Ursa (Avatar), Azula/Ty Lee (Avatar)
Series: The City Goer's Guide to the Secrets and Scandals of Republic City [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2145861
Comments: 8
Kudos: 54





	Now What'd You Expect me to Say, When you let me Slip From Your Hands?

**Author's Note:**

> The title was taken from the song: Carefully by Donna Missal, which sounds like a song about Azula and Ursa’s relationship from Azula’s point of view (to me at least.)

Zuko and Sokka were graduating! Only a limited number of tickets were available, students were able to get tickets for their family but not friends. Zuko was able to get two for his sister and uncle. Sokka was able to get three for his sister, dad, and his grandmother. The others: Aang, Toph (and Badge), Mai, Ty Lee, and Suki were loitering outside until the ceremony was done.

Once the ceremony was over, the graduates walked outside. Sokka and Zuko were mobbed by their friends, being hugged, and congratulated on their accomplishment.

“Congrats, Mr. Valedictorian,” Suki said to Sokka. “Did your speech bring everyone to tears?”

“Yeah, I cried because of how boring it was,” Azula answered for Sokka.

“Azula, come on, be nice,” Zuko said, “I cried because I love him, and it was a beautiful speech.”

“Thanks, babe. I worked really hard on that speech,” Sokka said.

“And I helped him,” Suki added. “I sorta gave everyone a rundown of what was contained inside your speech.”

“Her impression of you was hilarious,” Toph said.

“. . . I’m sure it was perfectly accurate because I’ve heard her impression of me before and it’s spot on,” Sokka said, causing everyone to laugh.

Iroh, Hakoda, and Sokka’s Gran-Gran took all the kids to dinner, everyone had a good time celebrating the boys’ accomplishment and talking about their summer plans!

One day during the summer, Zuko and Azula went over to Sokka and Katara’s house. Zuko went to play video games and make out with his boyfriend meanwhile Azula met with Katara to start planning her campaign for vice president of Student Government.

The two girls made massive headway in the campaign, having the whole thing outlined to a T so that the next time they could delve into specifics. Katara enjoyed seeing this side of Azula, she had never seen Azula behind the scenes before, and it was really cool to watch her work.

“Thanks for the help, Azula. I’m starting to understand why you won by such a margin sophomore year.”

“It takes practice and years of being forced into politics. I’m excited to help someone who actually wants the position to win the position.”

“And I’m happy you’re finally in a place where you can do what you want. I’d be more than happy to help you with anything if you need it.”

“Thanks, Katara. I appreciate that.”

“No problem, Azula. That’s what friends are for.”

“Now, how about we take a breather from planning and go interrupt our brothers in whatever they’re up to just because we can?” Azula suggested.

“I’m down for that.”

The pair went upstairs and broke up a make-out session between the boyfriends, just pushing themselves between the boys so they could sit down between them “So, we can all play video games together” they claimed. The four of them played games together (much to the boys’ dismay) until it was time for Zuko and Azula to go home.

“I don’t know about you, Zuzu, but I had a great time,” Azula said on their way home.

“I did too until you and your new friend decided Sokka and I weren’t allowed to have alone time anymore,” Zuko told her.

“Is there something wrong with two sisters wanting to spend time with their big brothers, Zuzu?”

“There is when we’re trying to make out!”

“You guys had plenty of time to make out. Besides, I was bonding with Katara, we’re friends now!”

“Well, I’m very glad to hear that! I was hoping you two would start to get along.”

“Me too. She’s really nice.”

“She is nice, but only when you’re on her good side”

“Yes. I’m well aware of what it’s like to be on her bad side.”

“Me too. Anyway, we’re not talking about that right now, next time you and Katara interrupt Sokka and me I’m going to make your life hell.”

Azula laughed, “bring it, Zuzu. I’ve already lived through hell; I can handle whatever you can throw at me.”

“We’ll see about that.”

Azula and Zuko arrived back home. They saw someone sitting at the counter when they walked in, they didn’t recognize her but her back was to them, “Zuko, Azula,” Iroh said, “you’re back.” 

“Hey, uncle, are we interrupting something?” Zuko asked as the pair walked in.

“No. Actually, I was waiting for you.” As the woman spoke, she turned and stood.

Zuko and Azula were both in shock but Zuko was able to ask, “mom?”

“Yes, it’s me. It’s been a while. It’s really nice to see you two,” Ursa said, smiling at the pair.

Zuko walked towards her, “I have so much to ask you.”

As Zuko moved forward, Azula backed up towards the door, “I need to go.”

Zuko turned, immediately forgetting about his mother. He could hear it in Azula’s voice how distressed she was. “Okay, Azula, we can go. We’ll go for a walk; do you want to go see Ty Lee? We can call Ty Lee.”

“No, no, you stay, I’ll call Ty.”

“I’m not going to leave you by yourself, Azula.”

Azula frowned. Not leaving her by herself? How many times was she by herself as a kid while Zuko was off with their mother! “I don’t need you, have fun with mother,” Azula said, opening the door, leaving, and closing it behind her.

Zuko frowned. He knew if he tried to call Azula she wouldn’t answer, so he called Ty Lee and explained Azula was upset and left and to please try and get in contact with her and let him know that she was safe. Once he had that squared away, he walked back into the apartment. “It’s nice to see you, mom, but maybe now isn’t the best time for you to be here.”

“I didn’t know what to expect from Azula but I thought you’d be happy to see me.”

“I am, believe me, I am, but Azula’s been thought a lot and I need to look out for her well-being.”

“I was hoping to talk to her, maybe fix our relationship.”

“She’s not going to come around that quickly, if at all. You need to give her space.”

Ursa nodded. “What’s happened to her? She. . . seemed different.”

Zuko thought for a moment how to phrase this, “it’s not my right to tell you, Azula will if she wants you to know.”

“I understand,” Ursa nodded. “Would you like to go somewhere so we catch up and I can apologize?”

“I don’t think today is the best day for that. I want to make sure Azula’s alright, but if you give me your number we can meet up sometime soon.”

“Of course,” Ursa said jotting her number down on a pen and paper Iroh handed her. 

Zuko took the number and put it in his pocket to put in his phone later, “I’ll see you soon, mom.”

“Goodbye, Zuko,” Ursa said before she left. 

“Hey, Zula.”

“Tell Zuko I don’t need you to be my babysitter.”

“Can’t I just call you because you’re my friend?” Ty Lee asked.

“Fine, friend, what do you want?”

“Where are you?”

“Skate park.”

Ty Lee was confused. Zuko sounded worried when he called her but Azula was just at the skate park, that was nothing to worry about, “practicing?”

“Anger management,” Azula had a habit, when in a rage, of doing one of two things: repressing it or unleashing it and destroying her room. Neither of those were good ways to get out her anger, so her therapist wanted Azula to find different ways of getting her anger out. They came up with three solutions: writing it out, playing it out via her guitar, or skating it out, “pretty sure if I pick up a guitar in this state the wood will splinter under my fingers.”

“Can I come skate with you?” Ty Lee asked.

“Do whatever you want, I’m not going to stop you.”

When Ty Lee got there Azula had stopped skating, she was holding her board in her lap, sitting on the edge of one of the bowls. Ty Lee walked over and sat down next to her. It took a few minutes for Azula to notice because she was thinking about how satisfying it would be to smash her skateboard into the ground over and over until it splintered into a million pieces. Then, she felt a hand on her shoulder. She was about the push whoever touched her off but when she saw it was Ty Lee wearing a kind and concerned expression all her white-hot burning anger melted away into sadness.

“You know what will make you feel better?” Ty Lee asked.

Azula didn’t respond verbally, just shook her head.

“Dumplings.”

Azula wasn’t sure these dumplings were gonna work but she was willing to try. She stood, “let’s get dumplings.”

“Okay! You’re gonna love the dumplings, there’s a new place that opened up down the street that Mai and I tried the other day and it’s _amazing_ ”

“You better not be exaggerating. I need some good food.”

“No way. I’m no fool, I wouldn’t ever get your hopes up about food. Azula gets good food and those who trick her about good food will perish.”

“Those are the rules and I’d really hate to kill you.”

“And I would hate to die. Who else is going to put makeup on your brother?!”

Despite her good day being ruined by the sudden and unwanted introduction of her mother, Azula smiled. Ty Lee always knew how to make Azula smile.

The dumplings were amazing, as Ty Lee said. During the meal, Azula asked Ty Lee about her day and let her do most of the talking. When the dinner was over, Ty Lee offered to walk Azula home but. . . “I don’t want to go home, yet. Can I spend the night with you?”

“Absolutely!” Ty Lee replied. “I think I still have some of your pajamas at my house. How about we stop and grab you a toothbrush on the way back to my place?”

“Good. Let’s do that.”

So, the pair went to the nearby drugstore and picked up a toothbrush (Ty Lee sneakily buying some ice cream as well), and then they went back to Ty Lee’s house for the night; Ty Lee making sure she did everything in her power to make sure Azula was happy and relaxed and felt safe.

When Azula was in her pajamas and wrapped in a blanket, just talking with Ty Lee she said, “my mom is back.”

“Your mom? Oh wow. . . That must be hard.”

Azula then unleashed everything on Ty Lee. All the repressed memories of her mother. Her mother ignoring her in favor of Zuko, treating her like a nuisance and Zuko like her precious little boy, scolding her without giving her a chance to explain herself, blaming her automatically for things that could have just as easily been Zuko’s fault, she can still hear it, “all I heard for years, even after she left, was her voice in my head, yelling at me, clear as day, _‘Azula, don’t do that!’, ‘Azula, that’s awful!’, ‘Azula, what is wrong with you?’”_ Azula squeezed her eyes shut willing herself not to cry but the tears still came. It didn’t matter how many times she told herself she didn’t care about her mom, she did, which is why seeing her again hurt so much and why she couldn’t talk about her without tears running down her face. Azula opened her eyes and wiped her tears away. She took a deep breath and felt a wave of guilt because not all the memories were bad, right? The good “memories” Azula has, she can’t tell if they are memories or just dreams, things Azula imagined because she wanted them. Did her mom give her a high-five when she got all 4’s (4 being the highest number grade) on her second-grade report card? Did she take her, Mai, and Ty Lee out for ices after violin practice? Did her mom come to and give her a round of applause after her violin recital at 8 years old? Did she. . . Did she. . . Did she. . . Azula looked to Ty Lee whose sad expression held no answers but maybe the fact that Azula couldn’t know for sure gave her the answers. “This year was going so well for me, Ty Lee. I’m learning about and actively dealing with my BPD, I was discharged from the hospital, my therapists are very helpful and there whenever I need them, I have more friends, and my relationships are stronger than they’ve ever been. I’ve cut toxic people, like my father out of my life. I feel- I felt safe, like I could be myself, and then I go home and I’m completely blindsided.”

“Is she staying with you guys?”

“I don’t know. I left the minute I saw her. I’m just worried she gonna be all over the place, when we were kids she and Zuzu were always together,” Ty Lee remembered that. Ty Lee never got to know Ursa very well because she always went over to play with Azula and always saw Ursa with Zuko but never Azula.

“Talk to him, tell him how you’re feeling. You know Zuko will listen, he loves you and wants you to be happy.”

“Yeah, I guess.” _Does he love me as much as he loves mommy dearest?_

“I’m sorry this is happening to you, Azula. You deserve the world; I wish your mom never came back into the picture.”

“So do I! And she’s just sitting in our kitchen as if nothing happened!”

“She should have called and asked if it was okay first. Doesn’t she realize showing back up like this can be traumatic?!”

“She doesn’t think about me, she doesn’t care about me.” _. . . She doesn’t love me, after all, who could love a monster?_ “I don’t want her back in my life.”

“Good, and I’ll support you 500% on not letting her back in.”

“Your support is all that I need.”

“I can and will support you always, Azula.”

“That’s why you're my best friend.”

“I love you, Azula. I don’t think I say that enough, but you deserve to hear it. I love you, you’re my best friend, and I would do anything for you.”

Azula smiled, “I. . . I’m tired. I’m going to sleep.”

“Do you want to stay in here so you’re not alone? You can stay in the guest room if you’re more comfortable there but staying in here is an option.”

“I’ll stay here.”

“Perfect. Now get under the covers so we can talk and laugh until we go to sleep.”

Azula slept through the night. She woke before Ty Lee. She was always an early bird, just like her brother. She waited until Ty Lee woke up, the two had some breakfast and then Ty Lee walked her home.

As they approached the apartment Ty Lee said, “do you want me to wait outside in case you need to come back to my place?”

“No. This is where I live, I can’t stay away forever. If she’s here I’ll tell her to leave but thank you for letting me stay with you last night.”

“You can stay with me whenever you want. Text me, I’m here for you.”

“Thank you.”

Before she left, Ty Lee hugged Azula. Azula found herself over the few months she’d been out of the hospital getting used to Ty Lee’s hugs.

When she walked into the apartment, Zuko and Iroh were cleaning up the kitchen from breakfast. When they heard the door open Zuko couldn’t help but go to the door to greet his sister. He knew she was safe at Ty Lee’s, but he still worried about her, “hey Azula, welcome home.”

“Is she here?”

“No, she’s not here.”

“Good. Never let her in here again, I don’t want to her face or hear her voice ever again.”

“You don’t even want to hear her out, Azula?”

“No! Why should I?!”

“I- I don’t know. You don’t want to know why she left? Why she’s been gone? Why she never wrote?”

“I don’t care! I was happy when she left, I didn’t need her, she made sure of that long before she left!”

“Okay, okay. I’m sorry. She won’t be back again, I promise.”

“Did you eat? We have some leftover pancakes.”

“Ty Lee and I had breakfast together.”

“Okay. Uh, I’m going to help uncle finish cleaning up. Do you want to watch a movie when I’m done?”

“I have work today. I asked for more hours since I have more free time. I’ll see you after.”

“Oh, alright. That’s cool. It’s good that you’re taking on some extra hours, that’s really responsible of you.”

“I should be responsible, I’m an adult.”

“Azula, your sixteen, you’re not an adult.”

“I’m close enough.”

“You still get to be a kid, Azula, don’t forget that.”

Azula didn’t want to be a kid. Kids were dumb and naïve. Kids got neglected. Kids got manipulated. Kids got traumatized. Azula never wanted to be a kid again.

Azula liked her job at the music store. Sure, it could be slow and boring with only one other shop associate around or she could have to deal with an awful customer, and her feet would ache after standing around or walking for eight hours but she got paid every two weeks and getting that $15 an hour paycheck in the mail made everything worth it. She was saving up for a piano, even though they were a lot of money. Other days she would practice skateboarding with Ty Lee and Suki. Suki loved how much Ty Lee and Azula were dedicating themselves to skating. At the end of every day, Azula was exhausted. Most days she went to bed early. 

Azula opened her eyes, she took deep breaths as her eyes adjusted to the darkness around her, she was in her room. She was laying on her bed and drenched in sweat, but she was safe. It was a dream, just a dream. No, a nightmare. She was at work, a place she liked and felt safe but all of a sudden, she was cornered by her mother. Her face was sad and soft. She heard her voice, “I love you, Azula, I do.” She said what Azula so desperately wanted to hear as a child but coming from her now it was lies. All Azula could think was “lies, lies, lies” then her mother’s face changed, hardened, a cruel smile on her lips, “of course I didn’t love you, you’re cruel” _No!_ “you’re manipulative” _Stop!_ “you’re abrasive” _Please!_ “you drive people away” _Shut up!_ “no one could ever love you” _Ty Lee could never love me._ That was when Azula woke up. That was not the only time, she had many dreams where she was cornered by her mother. Sometimes she fights back, she can’t control her anger when she does, she's lucky it’s only a dream as she wakes up before she can see herself do something she’d regret. Sometimes she’s a kid again. She’s hit with the pain of being neglected, her desperation for someone brings her to her father again but seeing him and the thought of being under his control is enough to wake her from those nightmares. Azula is exhausted, the initial fear is gone for now, but she can’t sleep, no matter how tired she is she knows she’ll just have a nightmare again.

After too many sleepless nights to count and too many days struggling to keep her eyes open, Azula gave in. She left late one night, she didn’t like going out at night, but she didn’t have a choice, this was the only way she could get what she needed without anyone knowing, without anyone seeing and recognizing her, she was the daughter of a public figure after all. She bought a burner phone and dialed up a number long deleted from her contacts, but not from her memory. When Azula got help and really felt like she was making progress and had long since left her reoccurring and painful anxiety-fueled nightmares behind, she swore she would never ever pick up another prescription sleeping pill but she felt like she had no choice. It was this or die of sleep deprivation, and with the anxiety of these dreams gave her an unhealthy need to not appear weak, which meant no matter how much she may have wanted to, she couldn’t bring herself to ask for help. She needed to deal with this on her own the only way she knew how. So, she called up her old dealer, dipped into her piano fund, and got the pills. She hid the bottle, as the pills quickly pulled her down into a dreamless sleep so she could wake feeling rested.

Azula did this for months, even into junior year. Azula was doing fine, or at least that’s what she tried to tell herself. In reality, she was starting to slip a bit back into how things used to be. It wasn’t intentional, and it wasn’t all the time. When she first got out of treatment, she had good days and bad days, because everyone has bad days, but the bad days were starting to look like the bad days before she got help. Everyone was noticing, and whenever Ty Lee or Zuko or anyone tried to bring up that they were there for her if she needed help, if she needed anything, she would ice them out for a day and then try to move on like nothing was the matter and nothing had happened. It was a spiral she didn’t realize she was on, and it was a dangerous slippery slope.

One day Zuko was looking for something in his closet and realized Azula borrowed a sweatshirt from him and hadn’t given it back. Azula didn’t like people going into her room when she wasn’t home but he was just wanted to get his sweatshirt back, so he went into her room to find it. He started looking around, going through her closet, the clothes tossed over her desk chair, and looking under the bed where he finally found it. When he picked it up, he knocked something onto the floor. In an effort to make his presence in the room unnoticeable he picked the object up to put it back where it was and realized it was a pill bottle. Looking at the label Zuko realized it was the same kind of pill bottle he saw in Azula’s room the first time he went in there after she was hospitalized. Zuko’s heart sank, this could mean any number of things, but one thing it absolutely meant was that his sister was in pain, she was struggling, and she was doing it alone. That ended today. When he got off his shift that night, he was going to talk to her about it.

Azula was in the room, after dinner, plucking at her guitar strings when he walked in. Her notebook was open, she was trying to write a song, and was visibly annoyed by his intrusion, “this better be important.”

“How are you doing, Azula? How are you feeling? What’s up? What’s new?” Zuko asked as he closed the door.

“I’m busy, Zuko.”

“Too busy for your own brother? Y’know we don’t hang out anymore.”

“I see you every day.”

“That’s definitely not the point here.”

“I have school 5 days a week, work 3 days a week, and therapy twice a week. So, yeah, I’m too busy for my own brother. Why don’t you try going to college and then tell me we don’t hang out anymore!”

Zuko frowned, “I know something’s up with you. You’re sliding backward.”

Azula’s body tensed, “no I’m not.”

“I saw your pills.”

Azula put her guitar to the side, “what pills?”

“The sleeping pills, Azula, you know exactly what I’m talking about.”

“Where do you get those?” Azula asked standing up.

“I was grabbing my sweatshirt and they fell out into the open. If you’re hurting, if you’re feeling alone again, please let us help you. I don’t want to lose you, Azula, I want you to be okay and happy. We’ll get you more help if you need it.”

“No, no. I’m not gonna- I can’t sleep, they help me sleep, that’s it.”

“That’s not it. You’re not okay, and I know I can’t tell you what you are and what you aren’t, but you’ve been slipping backward. You’re going back to your old ways and I don’t want to see you spiral again.”

“I can’t sleep, when I do I have nightmares unless I’m taking the meds and I’m so anxious all the time just like before.”

“And have you been talking to your therapist about it?”

“I haven’t. I can’t.”

“How is your therapist supposed to help you if you don’t talk to her?”

“I know what she is going to say.”

“And what is she going to say?”

“That I should talk to my mother because she’s the focal point of all the nightmares and causing me all this anxiety.”

“I know you don’t ever want to talk to or see her again, but don’t you think you should try and talk to her if it’ll make all this anxiety finally end.”

“I don’t know if I’ll be able to control myself around her, just thinking about her makes me so angry.”

“Okay. I can’t and won’t make you do anything you don’t want, but can you at least consider maybe talking to her?”

Azula sat down on the edge of the bed, “I’ll meet with her, but I want us to be alone when we talk.”

“Of course.”

Azula took a breath and shook her head, “I’ll do it, I can do it.”

“Yes, you can, because you’re strong, capable, confident, brave, and you deserve to be happy.”

Ursa was far more excited to be talking to Azula than Azula was to be talking to her. Iroh and Zuko agreed to leave them alone but didn’t want to be too far so they decided to let them talk in the tea shop after closing. Iroh let Ursa in and locked the door (anyone inside could leave but no one could enter) before he went upstairs where Zuko was with Azula and let Azula walk downstairs to talk with her.

“Azula, it’s so good to see you again,” Ursa said when Azula walked in.

Azula wanted to scream but instead, she said nothing and lets Ursa continue to talk. 

“I want to apologize for how I left during the divorce, I know it must have been hard waking up and realizing I was just gone-”

“Is that all you are going to apologize for?” Azula asked.

“What?”

“Is that it?” Azula said, saying each word slower but her tone also sharper.

“What do you mean? I did the best I could-”

Azula expected this idiocy from her brother but did Ursa really not understand, “after these years have you actually forgotten everything you’ve put me through? Or did you have to erase it from your memory so you could sleep soundly at night?”

Ursa shook her head.

“How can you not remember? You adored, Zuzu. You showered him with your love, spent all your time with him. It didn’t matter what I did! I excelled in piano and violin, I got straight A’s, won first place in competitions but he was always your favorite! And you had no love left for me!”

“Azula I- I never realized that I made you feel that way. I did the best I could for you-”

“Stop it! Stop saying that! You did the best you could _for Zuko!_ The only time you acknowledged I existed was to scold me, you never even hugged me!”

“Zuko needed me, you had your father’s love and adoration.”

 _My father._ “That wasn’t love! Don’t you get it, your neglect drove me into the arms of my father who tricked me into thinking his praise and manipulation was the love I craved. For years, I couldn’t form a relationship with my brother and the relationships with my friends were tenuous at best until it all fell apart!”

“. . . What do you mean ‘all fell apart?’”

“Good to know Zuzu is still loyal to me, he didn’t tell you the hell I’ve gone through this past year, why I’m living with Iroh instead of with dad. He kicked me out because I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and institutionalized after I tried to kill myself because everyone I ever tried to care about abandoned me!” Even though she didn’t want to and tried to stop it, her eyes welled up, bringing these painful memories to the surface and saying this all out loud was taking its toll on her emotionally.

“Oh, Agni. I can’t believe-. . . And your father just abandoned you?”

“Yeah. Sound familiar?” Azula took a deep breath, this was going nowhere, it was clear that Ursa wasn’t going to give her what she wanted: An apology. “I don’t need you like I did when I was a child. I have friends who care about me. I have Zuko and Ty Lee. They rushed to my bedside, they came to the hospital as often as they could, even when I was horrible to them, when I lashed out and screamed at them to get out, they stayed. They were there for me when I needed them and even when I didn’t, not because they had to but because they wanted to. They were the first people who showed me what it means to be a good friend, what it feels like to be loved. _They_ love me and I love them, I can’t imagine my life without them. But you? If Zuko wants you to be part of his life, that’s fine. But you didn’t love me when I was at my worst, so you don’t get to claim you love me now and you don’t deserve my forgiveness or my acceptance. I’m only going to say this once, so for the first time listen to me: stay out of my life.” When Azula finished talking she walked past her mother out the tea shop doors. 

As Azula walked down the street, she focused on breathing, the cool evening autumn air was refreshing. She wiped away the few tears that fell down her face, it felt good to finally get all those emotions out, but it was also very taxing. However, she wasn’t done yet. She texted Ty Lee to meet her in Fire Fountain Park. 

Ty Lee was just sitting at home waiting for a text from Azula, since she knew Azula was meeting her mother today. The minute she got the text she left and went right to the park to meet Azula, stopping to pick up fire flakes on the way just because she figured Azula might like a little pick-me-up.

Azula was sitting on the rocks by the turtle duck pond and smiled when she saw the fire flakes in Ty Lee’s hand, “you always know what I need.”

“How did it go?” Ty Lee asked as Azula took the fire flakes from her hand.

Azula shook her head, “she denied everything, she didn’t even apologize, I told her _everything_ and got nothing back, I thought- I had hoped it would have gone better, but she hasn’t changed at all.”

“I’m so sorry, Azula.”

“Am I wrong?” Azula asked, “I thought after I finally told her to get out of my life, I’d feel better and I did for a bit but now I can’t help but feel guilty.”

“No, you are not wrong. Azula, you don’t owe her anything. You gave her a chance and as you said, she hasn’t changed. But you, you have been through so much and you came out on the other side a better person, the kind of person you want to be, you don’t need Ozai or Ursa because you have so many other people who love and care about you. You shouldn’t feel guilty, you have done nothing wrong.”

“You know I care about you so much, even though I sometimes have trouble articulating how I feel, right?”

“Of course, I do, Azula.”

“Well, I don’t want to be like that anymore. I realized that if I can come out and tell my mom everything I’ve been holding inside me for years, then I can do this,” Azula took a breath before saying, “Ty Lee, I love you.”

Ty Lee smiled. “I love you too, Azula. You mean the whole world to me.”

“I don’t think you understand so let me put it this way,” Azula leaned in and gently kissed Ty Lee’s lips, “I love you.”

Ty Lee’s eyes widened as she realized what Azula meant. “Oh. O-OH! Oh you _love_ me. . . I never realized you felt that way.”

“It took me a while to realize it myself and then even longer to say it.”

“How long have you known?”

“Since I got out of the hospital.”

“Why did it take you so long to say, I’ve always told you I’m here for you always.”

“As I said, I’m not the best at talking about this stuff. Also, I had no idea if you’d like me back or not.”

“Well, I do, because you’re beautiful and amazing and my best friend in the whole world. Who better to be my girlfriend?”

“I’m so happy. I don’t know what I do without you.”

“Well, you’ll never have to find out. Now, if you don’t mind. . .” Ty Lee trailed off as she leaned in and kissed Azula.

Once the pair finally separated Ty Lee couldn’t stop smiling at Azula. “I’m so happy, Azula. I don’t think you could make me happier right now.”

“What if I took you out to dinner?”

“Out to dinner? I strike my previous statement, _now_ you couldn’t possibly make me happier.”

Azula smiled. “Pick any place in the city and I’ll take you there.”

“Okay! We’re going to Bhanti Restaurant, down the street.”

The two sat in a booth and Ty Lee was buzzing with excitement. The pair just talked casually and laughed and had a lovely time, Ty Lee held Azula’s hand over the table, which Azula allowed, and it was just really nice for both of them.


End file.
